Like mother like daughter, Tara finds a toyboy lover just like mum Joan

By Tess Stimson

Tara Newley is no ingènue. The 44-year-old daughter of soap siren Joan Collins and actor Anthony Newley has what might charitably be described as a chequered romantic history.

It includes two children by different fathers, a failed marriage, and - by her own admission - numerous "unsuitable" flings. She's the first to acknowledge she's been "unlucky in the heart sweepstakes".

But now Tara is in love again. And, like her eternally youthful mother, she's bagged herself a toyboy.

"His name is Paul Becks, and he's 29; that's 15 years younger than me," she says, for emphasis. "He's a flat roofer, and all my friends disapprove. Never mind. They'll get over it.

"It's not like I set out to snare a toyboy from the wrong side of the tracks. But if you fall in love, you fall in love. There's not much you can do about it."

It's easy to see why those who care for Tara view her latest beau with "fear and trepidation", as she puts it. Romantically, her life has been almost as much of a train-crash as her mother's.

Her first marriage, to French composer Michael Adam, produced one daughter, Miel, now nine, before ending in divorce.

There followed a string of failed relationships, all of them with younger men, before she moved to the West Country and set up home with property developer Richard Skeates, nine years her junior, and the father of her four-year-old son Weston (named after Weston-super-Mare in Somerset, where she lives). That, too, ended earlier this year.

"I'm not proud of my past," Tara says frankly. "I don't feel like a big achiever in the romantic stakes, but you have to go where your heart leads you. I'm not happy that I have two children by two different fathers, but life is messy.

"I would have loved to have found one man, settled down and lived happily ever after, but that wasn't on the cards for me. I just have to hope that, like Mum, I get it right eventually."

One hopes, for Tara's sake, it doesn't take her five trips up the aisle first, as it did La Collins.

"I can't pretend the age and social differences between Paul and I don't matter, they do. Not to me and Paul, perhaps, but certainly to everyone else. It really upsets me.

"I can tell some of my friends think he's taking me for a ride, but so what, let them. We're just happy to be together; our idea of the perfect date is to stay in and have a meal and a beer and just spend time together talking."

She admits that after only five months, they're still "in the honeymoon period". One wonders how blissful those quiet takeaways at home will seem in a year or two.

So is Paul "The One"? "I'm not going to jinx it," Tara says discreetly. "Paul's an amazing man, a great human being, and fantastic with my kids - he's won all our hearts.

"But will we get married, will it last forever? Who knows. I'm just taking it one day at a time. All I'll say is that I'm happier with him than I've ever been."

But, of course, it's not the first time she's said that.

Tara and Paul met through mutual friends not long after she moved to Somerset five years ago. At the time, she says, he was in a relationship, too, and for years they were just friends, "albeit very good ones". That changed five months ago, when she and Richard split up.

"We just had this amazing connection, this chemistry. You'd think we'd have nothing in common, but I could tell Paul anything, and he was just as comfortable with me. He's the kind of man who is not fazed by anything."

She admits he may have been a little starstruck at her family background at the outset.

"Everyone has preconceived notions about who I am, but the truth is I'm more Hackney than Hollywood, and anyone who knows me soon realises that."

Now, she says, he's just as comfortable moving in her world of red-carpet premieres and glitzy parties as he is with his own friends. For her own part, Tara insists she's never been impressed by fame and celebrity either.

"Despite being a celebrity brat, both my parents are very grounded and down-to-earth," she says. "Dad was dirt poor once upon a time, practically in the poorhouse. And Mum may be one of the most glamorous women in the world, but to me she's just Mum.

"I may have had a privileged upbringing, but deep down, I'm just an East End girl. Mum taught me not to judge a book by its cover," she adds.

"The truth is I've never been attracted to 'posh' blokes. I don't know why, maybe it's because of my dad - they say girls love men like their fathers - but every time I imagine going to bed with a posh man, I get the giggles.

"I just picture them in bed going, 'Oh, yah, dahling, yah!' I'm sorry, it's such a turn-off. I've always fancied working-class men, but what's wrong with that?"

And younger men? "Well, yes, but can you blame me?" Tara laughs.

"People always assume it's about sex, and that's part of it - they say men are in their sexual prime between 18 and their mid-30s, whereas women don't reach their peak until their 40s, so the older woman/younger man pairing makes sense, scientifically.

"But it's more than that. Younger men still have a sense of adventure. I've never been out with a man older than myself, and I don't think I ever will.

"Younger men haven't become encrusted in their shells or set in their ways so that no woman can change them. They're still open to discussion and exploration, and you can have a great conversation with them.

"Paul and I talk about anything and everything. I'm constantly surprised by how open and approachable he is. That has nothing to do with class or age - it's just him."

It's hard not to be affected by Tara's enthusiasm for a man whose appearance is a world away from the glamorous movie stars her mother has mixed with all her life.

His ear is pierced, his head shaved, and a "designer" beard adorns his face. She insists her mother "loves him, she thinks he's a perfect gentleman", but when pressed, admits Joan is 'aware' of the differences in their backgrounds.

Reading between the lines, you can't help suspect the jury's still out on Paul as far as her mother is concerned.

Tara is deeply hurt by suggestions that Paul is just in the relationship for what he can get out of it, and is no more than a plaything dancing attendance on her.

"Paul is his own man. I wouldn't want a lapdog, and there's no way Paul would play that role. He is very much my equal in every respect. I hate the term 'toyboy' - it's so demeaning. In our relationship, it's Paul who wears the trousers."

She admits this has led to "clashes" in the past. "We both want to drive the car when we go out, for example, and Paul says I'm a lunatic behind the wheel. I always end up giving in. Like I say, he's the one who wears the trousers."

You can't help feeling this may wear thin after a while, but as Tara points out, "who wants to sit safely by the fire with someone who laughs at all your jokes?

"We're put on this earth to learn something, not just to sit back and enjoy life, and I can do that better with someone who challenges me."

Tara may be in love, but she's nobody's fool. She's aware of the potential pitfalls of dating a man who at first blush has so little in common with her, but she's philosophical.

"Of course, I worry about the age difference. I'm far too sensitive about it, I know. Mum was asked about the 32-year gap between her and Percy [Gibson, Joan's fifth husband], and said: 'If he dies, he dies.'

"I wish I could be that relaxed about it. But then, find me a 44-year-old woman who's not concerned her man will run off with a younger model, no matter how old he is himself.

"They say a man should look at a girl's mother to see how she's going to turn out, so in that respect I'm very lucky. Paul looks at Mum, and worries I'm the one who'll ditch him for a younger man."

For the friends who sneer at her working-class lover, Tara has nothing but contempt.

"They may look down their noses at him because of what he does, but that says more about them than it does about him. The fact that he doesn't let it get to him is a mark of how strong and confident he is."

Despite her pride in her boyfriend, Tara's clearly embarrassed at all the attention. She hates that Paul's age and job is all that anyone sees, and is keen to emphasise that she didn't set out to be the poster-girl for toyboy relationships.

"If I was 29 and he was 44, no one would be the least bit interested. I can't wait for the day when people don't even raise an eyebrow at women marrying a man ten, 15, 20 years younger. What right does anyone have to wave a finger in my face and tell me I'm making a mistake?"

Clearly, Tara - like her mother - is a girl who believes in learning by experience, however much it costs her later. Neither she nor Paul - who has a son by a previous relationship - wants any more children.

"We're happy with our brood. And anyway, I'm too tired!" she laughs. "I want to concentrate on my career now. I've just co-written a sitcom about the publishing industry called So!, and Mum is going to play the loopy wife of a wealthy magazine owner.

"She's a terrific comedienne, and I'm determined she'll be back on all our screens again soon."

Paul himself seems remarkably levelheaded and unbothered by all the attention.

She's just Tara to me," he says. "I've always just taken her at face value. I'm very relaxed about things.

"She's never tried to change me, so I just go out to work, come back home, take care of the kids, and try to be the person she can lean on." He says he's never considered the age difference to be an issue, and isn't interested in parties and film premieres.

"It's not my cup of tea, to be honest," he says. "If Tara wanted me to come with her, I'd be there for her, but it's not really my scene." This doesn't quite chime with Tara's rose-tinted insistence that Paul mixes easily with her social set, but it would be a churlish person indeed who didn't hope that she has finally found her Prince Charming, albeit in a rather unexpected place.

"Paul's been wonderful in helping me put my life together," she says. "I feel so lucky to have found him. Who cares how old he is, or how he makes his living?

"I hope that by the time my daughter is old enough to find love herself, she can follow in her mother and grandmother's footsteps and settle down with a fabulous man half her age, and by then no one will even notice.

"If that happened, and he brought her even a fraction of the happiness I've had with Paul, she'll be a lucky girl."